Grumpy Old Git Gaming

Crash Bandicoot is a 1996 platformer developed by Naughty Dog and published by Sony Computer Entertainment for the PlayStation One. The player controls Crash, a genetically enhanced bandicoot created by the mad scientist Doctor Neo Cortex. The story follows Crash as he aims to foil Cortex's plans for world dominance and rescue his girlfriend, Tawna, a female bandicoot also created by Cortex. The game is played from a third-person perspective, in which the camera trails behind Crash, though some levels feature forward-scrolling and side-scrolling perspectives. I thought that this game was really pretty good—not the best platformer that I have ever played—but it was certainly a lot of fun and kept me coming back. I liked the off-the-wall humour and had to pause to laugh at this game more than once. It was nice to see a game developed that didn't take itself all too seriously and allowed the player to just have fun goofing around. The mechanics were fairly solid, and I never had t...

Cover Girl Strip Poker, alternately titled Cover Girl Poker, is a 1991 erotic game based upon five-card poker and was originally developed and self-published by Emotional Pictures. It was released for the Amiga, DOS, Commodore 64, CDTV, and CD32 home computer systems. Cover Girl Strip Poker is the original Danish title; it was retitled Cover Girl Poker outside of Denmark in the rest of Europe, and the title was subsequently reverted to Cover Girl Strip Poker for the European CDTV and CD-ROM DOS releases. Emotional Pictures was a subsidiary of the Danish company InterActive Vision A/S. Personally, I thought that this game was complete garbage. I mean, I knew that it was bad, but wow. The gameplay is dull and repetitive, with nothing on offer here that you couldn't find in several other games of the time. The gameplay is shocking, plain, and simple. The AI is just stupid; I can't really think of any other way to put it. Once you have the computer responses worked out, it is a cas...

Conker's Bad Fur Day is a 2001 platform game developed and published by Rare for the Nintendo 64. The game follows Conker, a greedy, hard-drinking red squirrel who must return home to his girlfriend after a binge-drinking session. Most of the game requires the player to complete a linear sequence of challenges that involve jumping over obstacles, solving puzzles, and fighting enemies. A multiplayer mode in which up to four players can compete against each other in seven different game types is also included. It is the second installment in the Conker series, after Conker’s Pocket Tales. Although visually similar to Rare's previous games, such as Donkey Kong 64 and Banjo-Kazooie, Conker's Bad Fur Day was designed for mature audiences and features graphic violence, alcohol and tobacco use, profanity, vulgar humour, fourth wall breaks, and pop culture references.     I really loved playing through this game and thought that it was a fantastic way to send the N64 off, until the...